Who is Butch/Bob? - Pt. 1

Bob is a friend of mine in NYC that I met years ago during the Ninties when I was seeing Tom. (Funny how the Ninties to me mean two things - The Clinton Years and Tom). During the last year or so of my time in NYC, Bob became a really good friend. I miss him. He's defintely on my top three list of People I Miss in NYC. We met in a rather random way, and I met him as Butch.

Tom was invited to a birthday party of his friend, Butch. This must have been Butch's 47th birthday. I had just started seeing Tom and that was in 1991. Butch's birthday is in December. Anyway, we showed up and I was introduced around. It was a lot of Tom's program friends. It was Chinese.

At the end of the dinner, Butch did this thing that I later adopted. He said that it was a Chinese tradition for the person whose birthday it is to give a gift to everyone at the celebration. He brought out a little bag and gave everyone there - probably about ten men - a little box with two chocolates in it.

Years later, I recalled this story when I gave token gifts to people at my birthday celebrations. So Butch was on my mind all those years. I thought it was such a nice thing to do. This year I cooked for a small group of friends.

I didn't see him for years except in passing. It was all of Tom's program friends and I was on the outside of that crowd. I was on the outside of a lot of Tom's life, but that's another story.